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What is the funniest/ Dumbest thing you saw or heard while in the service?


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#1 rooster77

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Posted 02 December 2019 - 01:30 PM

Greetings everyone.

I thought that it would be informative to shedd light on the seldom spoken of mishaps and foilbles dumbness and downright ridiculous things that you saw or heard while serving in any branch of the US Military in peacetime or in War. Cant take your job too seriously. Comedy keeps it real. Everyone who served has something that stood out.

 

"Its not the uniforms... Its the stories you tell."

 

I'l start off with something I saw once at a fuel stop during a convoy.

Army National Guard. I watched a guy from the motorpool, tapping a 3 pound sledge hammer on a spare tire that was mounted on a vehicle. I guess he was bored and passing the time.... He bounced it off the tire about 3 times and the next time he hit the tire, the sledge bounced back and smacked him right in the forehead.....

It is one of the dumbest things I saw in there.... That and people whizzing on the tires of vehicles.

 



#2 rooster77

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Posted 02 December 2019 - 02:12 PM

In all truth.. Theres a bunch more. I was only National Guard but my time in spanned 16 years and I spent a year in the Army Reserve.  Some of the best ones... I can t figure out how to tell on here without offending somebody!!! lol lol Meaning some stories from infantry training arent public fodder.

lol

 

Please feel free to contribute.


Edited by rooster77, 02 December 2019 - 02:15 PM.


#3 Flashlarue

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Posted 02 December 2019 - 02:17 PM

As part of the 1st AD was assigned to follow a tracked ambulance commanded by a 1st Lt. one night during Desert Storm, just his track and my hummer. Driving with only blackout lights he led us across the desert in Iraq. After quite a while of driving he came to a stop and admitted he was lost. He had been navigating using only a hand held compass from inside the ambulance without realizing the metal of the vehicle would effect it. While stopped we were approached by a large group of Iraqi soldiers trying to surrender. Unable to navigate to where we were going he decided we had to wait out the night there surrounded by dozens of enemy soldiers. I suggest a better solution might be turning around and following our own tracks back to were we came from. Fortunately he agreed and we did an about face and returned to the unit.

#4 rooster77

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Posted 02 December 2019 - 02:20 PM

As part of the 1st AD was assigned to follow a tracked ambulance commanded by a 1st Lt. one night during Desert Storm, just his track and my hummer. Driving with only blackout lights he led us across the desert in Iraq. After quite a while of driving he came to a stop and admitted he was lost. He had been navigating using only a hand held compass from inside the ambulance without realizing the metal of the vehicle would effect it. While stopped we were approached by a large group of Iraqi soldiers trying to surrender. Unable to navigate to where we were going he decided we had to wait out the night there surrounded by dozens of enemy soldiers. I suggest a better solution might be turning around and following our own tracks back to were we came from. Fortunately he agreed and we did an about face and returned to the unit.

 

As soon as I read that you had to follow a 1st lt I knew trouble was coming... lol

Good one!!! And smart too to follow your tracks back instead of sitting there! We used to follow people all over the woods who were holding their compass over their weapons... lol

At least he took your advice... Some of em wont.


Edited by rooster77, 02 December 2019 - 02:23 PM.


#5 rooster77

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Posted 02 December 2019 - 02:50 PM

We were training in the woods in Wisconsin late 1980's . Middle of June 33rd infantry Brigade.

We had a wierd thermometer they used to use to measure heat and humidity. I think theycalled it a wet bulb. When it got too hot../.

They were supposed to stop training.. Well it was reading in the Black 98 degrees high humidity... so we decided as a platoon to loosen the boot cuffs and loose the BDU shirt but retain

the rest of our gear because we had to keep training. We had the regular Army evaluators up from Georgia attached to us and this one Sergeant First class just was not happy about it. But since we were all in uniform he couldnt do anything. But he complained about how we should be wearing our BDUshirts.

Around dinner time up by where they were serving chow... I heard sombody ask him... Are you going to eat Sergeant?

He says real loud and all put out... Hell no its too hot to eat !!!

And he took his clean uniform wearing self back to the contonement to sleepwhile we stayed out there. lol lol

 

To Evaluate us..........

 

The Regular Army always sent us the people they wanted to get rid of for a while.


Edited by rooster77, 02 December 2019 - 02:55 PM.


#6 CNY Militaria

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Posted 02 December 2019 - 04:25 PM

Too many stories to tell, but one that is sort of related to this forum...

 

I was a fairly new Second Lieutenant and had just assumed a platoon leader position. About a week into it we had a Friday where we were wearing our ASU's all day. My platoon Sergeant, an E-7 with about 16 years in, had his Bronze Star ribbon at the bottom and in the middle of his ribbon rack, along with some others out of place. I politely pointed out that he may want to correct it before the 1SG or CSM saw it, and he looked at me with a serious face and asked "Wait, there is an order for these?" He had a good laugh and said he just put them on however he wanted.

 

He honestly didn't know. Not sure how he made it past his DA photo for promotion, but somehow did!


Edited by CNY Militaria, 02 December 2019 - 04:26 PM.


#7 rooster77

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Posted 02 December 2019 - 05:26 PM

"He honestly didn't know. Not sure how he made it past his DA photo for promotion, but somehow did!"

 

Thats a good one Sir! I bet it was that Bronze Star !!!

 

 

My buddy in basic could not put his web gear together. Couldnt figure it out.

Thats what the buddy system is for!




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